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ENGLISH DOCS FOR THIS DATE- TV-Demo - Prepchecking Part I (L2-09, SHSBC-149) (2) - L620502 | Сравнить
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- TV-Demo - Prepchecking Part II (L2-10, SHSBC-150) (2) - L620502 | Сравнить
- TV-Demo - Prepchecking Part II (L2-10, SHSBC-150) - L620502 | Сравнить

CONTENTS TV DEMO PREPCHECKING PART 2 Cохранить документ себе Скачать

TV DEMO PREPCHECKING PART 2

TVD-4B rennumbered SHSBC-150 2 May 62 TV Demo: Prepchecking, Part II A lecture given on 2 May 1962 [Based on Clearsound only, not checked against the old reels.]

LRH: (laughs) All right. Pick up the cans.

- Okay, honey. Is it all right with you if I begin this session now?

PC: Yes.

LRH: All right. Here it is. Start of session. Has the session started for you?

PC: - Mmm. (clears throat)

LRH: Very good. All right. How are you - doing?

PC: Well, I'm fine now that I'm back in the chair. I was a bit dispersed (chuckles) out in the hall.

LRH: Oh, yeah. AU right. Now, very good. Have I missed a withhold on you?

PC: No.

LRH: Well, there's a little latent tick here. There might be something on it. (pause) There it is.

PC: Well yeah. Just uh . . . (chuckles) I was pretty, pretty far out of present time when you (laughs) ended the session.

LRH: All right. All right. Okay.

PC: That's...

LRH: All right. Did I fail to find out about that?

PC: Yeah:

LRH: All right. When was that?

PC: Well, when I went clattering down the hall by myself I couldn't find Suzie's bathroom.

LRH: All right. Very good. Okay. Now, have I missed a withhold on you?

PC: No.

LRH: All right. Is there anything else there? Any other thing I might have missed a withhold on?

PC: Mm-mm [no].

LRH: Okay. Now let me check this.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: Have I missed a withhold on you? All right. That's going independently.

PC: What does that mean?

LRH: Now, you listen to me.

PC: All right.

LRH: Now, you listen to me now.

PC: Okay.

LRH: To me. To me. All right. Have I missed a withhold on you?

PC: No.

LRH: That's right. You're absolutely right. (chuckles)

All right. Now, we were going great guns here on something that happened in a cornfield.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: All right. Now, is it all right with you if I get on with this?

PC: Sure.

LRH: All right. Now, apparently you've been packing an awful lot of they-should-have-found-out-about-me's here, on this subject.

PC: Um.

LRH: Hm?

PC: Mostly Mother, yeah.

LRH: Well has this been basic - yes, it's Mother all right, because I've got a double tick here I'm following down.

PC: Umm.

LRH: It's a - I'm getting wider ... the closer we get in to the base on this, why, the more we're getting close to this little - double tick. Okay?

PC: Mmm.

LRH: And that's what we're looking for. We're looking for something ... Apparently every time you say something about your mother or his mother, or something, we get this double tick.

PC: Yeah?

LRH: See, I can turn this on here. All right. What should your mother have found out about you? See, and there's a ... there it is (chuckles) - little one.

PC: Yeah, this is ...

LRH: See, I say something on that order. Now, you want so answer that question?

PC: Well, sure. She should have found out that I wasn't ah ... as pure and perfect as she thought I was.

LRH: As who was?

PC: As she thought I was.

LRH: Oh, all right. All right.

PC: Or that she insisted that I should be ...

LRH: All right.

PC: ... is more in line.

LRH: All right. Now, we're following down the track here about sleeping with a man to trap him.

PC: Umm.

LRH: And we're mining gold all the way. But I think there is an incident before 1926.

PC: I think there is, too, but I haven't a clue.

LRH: And where is it? You said two years earlier.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: And you didn't know whether it was or wasn't. Well, what happened two years before this time? Where were you living?

PC: In uh ...

LRH: That's it.

PC: Park City.

LRH: Hm-hm.

PC: Montana.

LRH: Park City what?

PC: Montana.

LRH: Montana. Park City. All right. And is there some sort of an incident there where you got all missed up with somebody or something?

PC: Mm-mm [no].

LRH: Is there any incident in Park City? I don't know here. I'm getting a little bit of a rough line.

PC: Well, there could be but...

LRH: Is there some incident in Park City? No it isn't Park City. Is there some ...

PC: Is it Glen Ullin - Glen Ullin, North Dakota, then?

LRH: Is that earlier?

PC: Well, that would be in - when I was four, we moved from ...

LRH: Yeah.

PC: ... Glen Ullin to Park City.

LRH: Well, haven't you any memory back of ...

PC: No.

LRH: ... that at all, huh?

PC: Just splotchy pictures.

LRH: Hm-hm. Just got some pictures?

PC: Mm.

LRH: What pictures?

PC: Well, I've got a picture of a stone house that I assume is my birthplace.

LRH: All right.

PC: Then later in Park City, I've got a couple or three pictures.

LRH: Hm-hm. All right. Is there any other - incident here with your brothers? I get a little slowdown there.

PC: Well, there is the one incident with my brother Bob. But this is not on sex-line stuff.

LRH: What about that, what roughly?

PC: Well, I was supposed to care for him, and ...

LRH: And you didn't.

PC: Well, there's some mystery on this one. I don't understand my reactions in that.

LRH: Well, what is your reaction?

PC: Well, a little girl tried to take him away from me, and I got panicky ...

LRH: Hm-hm,

PC: ... and it's way out of proportion to the situation.

LRH: Well, what happened?

PC: I hit her in the stomach with a rock.

LRH: And what happened with that?

PC: That's all. Just - she... I - it hurt.

LRH: Hm-mm.

PC: And I got my brother back, but ...

LRH: Hm. How old were you then?

PC: Four.

LRH: About four. Is that the incident here on the 19...

PC: 1924.

LRH: That's the 1924 incident.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: That's it. Tick-tick.

PC: Mm-hm.

LRH: All right. This have to do with a man?

PC: Hm. Took my brother, who was a ...

LRH: All right. Well was he ...

PC: he was younger.

LRH: What was he? A boy?

PC: Mm-hm. Two.

LRH: All right. It had to do with a boy.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: All right. And what about this boy?

PC: Well I was supposed to take care of hm.

LRH: Right ...

PC: Mother said I should look out for him.

LRH: Mm-hm.

PC: Ant uh ... I had agreed to ... to care for him.

LRH: Hm-hm.

PC: But uh ... this little girl was just teasing, said I was ... she was going to take him away from me. And just - I got panicky.

LRH: Hm-hm.

PC: And I it is - it was just almost a reflex action. I picked up the rock and threw it at her to stop her ...

LRH: Hm-mm.

PC: ... from taking him away. I don't know where the hell she would have taken him.

LRH: Yeah.

PC: She was only four, too.

LRH: Yeah.

PC: You see?

LRH: And where did the rock cut her?

PC: In the stomach.

LRH: Uh-huh. She bleed much?

PC: It didn't cut her.- It just went POW in her stomach.

LRH: I see. It just went POW in her stomach. Did she bleed much?

PC: She didn't bleed at all.

LRH: Are you sure?

PC: Yeah.

LRH: You're sure?

PC: Well, no. Of course, I'm not sure. (laughs) But I don't think so.

LRH: Come on. How seriously was this little girl injured?

PC: Well she ... she cried. And I just imagine, because it hit her in the stomach, that it was awful painful. It is when it - when I get hit in the stomach.

LRH: Huh?

PC: It's...

LRH: What else did you do to her?

PC: That's all - I think.

LRH: All right. Did you hit her in the stomach?

PC: Mmm.

LRH: With a rock.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: That's it. With a rock.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: All right. Who else did you hit with a rock?

PC: Oh, well, heavens, I ...

LRH: Oh, well, now we're onto something else.

PC: Now, yeah. But not earlier. I mean, I used to throw rocks at my brothers. I don't think I ever hit them though.

LRH: Uh-huh.

PC: I was a lousy shot.

LRH: All right. But which one of them did you blood?

PC: How did blood get into the act?

LRH: I don't know how blood got into this.

PC: - Oh. (pause; laughs) Well, well, there's my brother Bob. There's the incident when I hit him into a rock. I mean, it was concrete. It wasn't I - that I threw a rock at him, but I hit his head into a rock - into concrete.

LRH: Hm-hm, you did.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: And that bled?

PC: Yeah, that bled

LRH: That bled.

PC: That bled. Yes.

LRH: All right. Fine. How old was he?

PC: Uh-... he was older then. He was - oh, I should say four and I was six. That's roughly.

LRH: All right. And what did you do?

PC: I made an airplane out of him. I was swinging him around ...

LRH: Yeah.

PC: ... me.

LRH: Mm.

PC: I was going around and held him by the feet, you see ...

LRH: Mm. Mm.

PC: and I was swinging him round, and I hit his head into the concrete block.

LRH: Because you were dispersed.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: Go on.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: And what happened there?

PC: Well, I injured him very seriously.

LRH: How seriously?

PC: Well, he's still got a knot on his head which he ...

LRH: Uh-huh.

PC: assures me every time I see him that I did it. And I did.

LRH: All right. What did this do to him mentally, at the time?

PC: Hmm. Well, he - I think he was almost out cold.

LRH: Hm-hm.

PC: I was going to say it cold-cocked him.

LRH: Well, did it?

PC: Uh ... it stunned hm, it uh ... it did. Yes.

LRH: Mm. Mm. What did you think you had done at that time?

PC: Well, I thought I had injured him beyond repair, really.

LRH: Yeah.

PC: Like his head was pretty wide open.

LRH: And when was that?

PC: 1926, I would say roughly.

LRH: Mm-hm.

PC: I'm not sure.

LRH: All right. When was it? Have you been told about this or do you remember it?

PC: Oh, no. I remember it.

LRH: You remember doing this.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: All right.

PC: ... was having a ball.

LRH: All right. And?

PC: And I slipped, actually. I mean, I got his head too low, and it cracked up against the concrete.

LRH: Uh-huh.

PC: And he - he was stunned. I don't remember whether Mother patched him up or not.

LRH: All right. Well what might have appeared there?

PC: Well, the wound.

LRH: Hm-hm. Very good. And who didn't find out about it?

PC: I don I think Dad did.

LRH: Hm-hm. Who did you withhold that from?

PC: Well, from Dad.

LRH: Hm-hm. Anybody else fail to find out about it?

PC: The doctor. I don't think he was taken to the doctor.

LRH: Took him to the doctor?

PC: They didn't take him.

LRH: They didn't

PC: Mm-mm [no].

LRH: Doctor didn't find out about it.

PC: Mm-mm [no].

LRH: Well, who else didn't find out about it?

PC: (sighs) I'm not so sure Mother did. I think it was my sister patched him up.

LRH: Hm-hm.

PC: I don't remember, but I don't think she did.

LRH: Was there a big secrecy involved in this?

PC: Well, just occlusions more than secrecy. I don 't remember.

LRH: Oh, no-no, no, no, no-no-no, no, no. Now, now, you weren't carrying any banner signs around there ...

PC: Oh, of course not!

LRH: ... telling everybody "I busted my little brother's head open."

PC: No no, no. No.

LRH: All right. Who did you keep this from?

PC: Oh, well, I kept that from the kids in school, and teachers, and...

LRH: Hm-hm, And your father and your mother?

PC: Mother, and anybody that would have made me guilty.

LRH: All right.

PC: Like the towns people.

LRH: Very good. And do you actually remember, now, suppressing that?

PC: Yeah. Sure you wouldn't - that's a now-I'm-supposed-to, actually. I mean, you wouldn't go around saying you'd bashed your brother's head in.

LRH: Yeah, but did your mama know about it?

PC: I don't think so.

LRH: How did she escape knowing about it?

PC: Oh, well, my sister was very effective in patching up wounds.

LRH: Mm-hm. Mm-mm. She helped you suppress this.

PC: Yeah. Well, actually my brother did too.

LRH: He helped you, too.

PC: Well, we protected each other from our parents.

LRH: All right. Very good. And did you get your brother to agree not to tell?

PC: No it was a tacit agreement.

LRH: I see. You didn't tell him not to tell.

PC: No

LRH: You just knew he wouldn't.

PC: Yeah. I just knew he wouldn't.

LRH: And your father didn't find out?

PC: No.

LRH: And your mother didn't ...

PC: I know my father didn't.

LRH: Your mother didn't find out?

PC: I'm not sure...

LRH: Mm-hm.

PC: about my mother, whether it was Mother that patched him. Mother would have protected us ...

LRH: Well, did your sister even know?

PC: (Sigh) Well ... (pause) I don't know. I don't know. It was either Mother or my sister Agatha that patched him up. And if it was Mother, my sister didn't know.

LRH: Hm?

PC: If it was Mother that patched him up, then my sister didn't know.

LRH: Well, which is it that didn't know?

PC: I don't know. Must have been my sister because I think my mother would have beat me up, and I don't remember getting beaten up by my mother. I'm just assuming now though.

LRH: You got this figured out that way.

PC: Yeah!

LRH: Yeah.

PC: It's just logical.

LRH: But here's a head injury - here's a head injury that remained a secret to your family.

PC: (pause) Hm.

LRH: Is that right?

PC: Mm-hm.

LRH: All right.

PC: That s not unusual.

LRH: All right. It's not unusual, but I'm just pointing out that here is ...

PC: Mm-hm.

LRH: ... an incident of that character. What else did you do to bloody your brothers up?

PC: (pause) Well, I've got the later incident with my brother Jake when we got into a fight.

LRH: Mm-hm.

PC: I didn't bloody him up though. Oh, I guess I did. I scratched him.

LRH: Oh, you guess you did it.

PC: Uh yes, I did.

LRH: Now come on. Did you or didn't you?

PC: Yes, I did.

LRH: All right. When was it?

PC: Oh, that was way later. I was about fifteen.

LRH: All right, honey. And what did that consist of?

PC: You mean, you want all of it? (chuckles)

LRH: Well ...

PC: (laughs) Well, I was supposed to fix has lunch, and I didn't. So he tried to get me to fix his lunch, and I fought back.

LRH: Yeah. And what did you do?

PC: Well I just uh ... See, I was littler than he was. And I just fought like I wasn't.

LRH: All right. Okay.

PC: And I - he got so mad that he forgot I was littler, and we had a fought like we were evenly matched.

LRH: Yeah. What did you do to him?

PC: Oh. just uh . . it was pretty dispersed, but I - I kicked and clawed and bit ...

LRH: Hm-hm.

PC: in any part of the body that I could - could get ahold of ...

LRH: All right. Good. And what did you do?

PC: Uh ... well, mostly scratched him and bit him.

LRH: All right.

PC: ... kicked - yeah, I kicked him, too.

LRH: Did you bloody him up?

PC: Don't - he got - I don't have a picture, but I assume if I - if scratched, I would have bloodied him up. Sure.

LRH: Mmm.

PC: I mean I ...

LRH: Well, what do you know you've done there?

PC: Just that I fought tooth and toenail ...

LRH: All right.

PC: ... with all the strength I could conjure up at fifteen ...

LRH: That's good.

PC: ... with this body.

LRH: All right.

PC: Now I know.

LRH: All right. And who did you both keep that from?

PC: Mother.

LRH: All right. Anybody else?

PC: Dad.

LRH: All right. Okay. That's all.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: Seems like seems like you didn't seem to enjoy the confidence of your parents anywhere along the line.

PC: I didn't. (chuckles)

LRH: You didn't, huh?

PC: Oh, no.

LRH: What did you do? Has this lifetime been a career of keeping things away from your mother?

PC: Mm-mm. Mostly Dad.

LRH: Mostly Dad.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: Mother? Keeping things from Mother?

PC: Well, yeah. There would be some type things I'd keep from Mother, and there'd be other type.

LRH: Sex.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: Sex you'd keep from Mother.

PC: Yeah. I'd keep from Mother.

LRH: That's good.

PC: And anything that would provoke my dad's temper, I would keep from Dad. And fighting would provoke his temper, you see?

LRH: Mm-hm. All right. He'd get mad, in other words.

PC: Oh, he'd get... Yeah.

LRH: He'd get furious.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: All right. So keeping things from Dad? That's bing, bing.

Now, what type of thing would you keep from Dad?

PC: Well, I'd keep breakage...

LRH: Yeah.

PC: ... getting unto trouble with uh ...

LRH: Good.

PC: ... the school authorities.

LRH: All right.

PC: And beating up the guy who tried to beat us up for stealing his watermelons.

LRH: Right.

PC: These things.

LRH: Go on.

PC: Just if I would get into trouble ...

LRH: All right.

PC: ... I would keep it from Dad.

LRH: Any trouble ...

PC: Yeah.

LRH: ... would be kept from Dad.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: So he's the symbol of no - communication if in trouble.

PC: (chuckles) Yeah.

LRH: Is that right?

PC: Well, he's more than that. He wouldn't let us talk to him, actually, either.

LRH: He said, no, huh?

PC: He just said "Don't talk! Just talk when you 're spoken to."

LRH: Oh, I see. All right.

PC: And we hat that one and then the other one, we don't talk if we got into trouble, because why invite more trouble?

LRH: All right. How did you trap your father?

PC: Oh! Gee! I did that with ARC.

LRH: All right. How did you do that?

PC: Just uh ... (sighs) I ...

LRH: Go on.

PC: Well, I just wouldn't let him keep this game going. I moved in, got close to him.

LRH: Hm-hm.

PC: Got him off of this German "I am the father and you are the child, so therefore you must never speak to me unless you're spoken to."

LRH: Mm-hm.

PC: I just would speak to him.

LRH: Mm.

PC: I would demonstrate affection.

LRH: Mm-hm.

PC: And it worked.

LRH: All right. What didn't he find out about this?

PC: Hmm. (sighs) Well, mostly what he didn't find out was that he didn't have a prayer with ... with this - with our family after he got off of that one that he used to control us.

LRH: All right. And what didn't he have a prayer with, how, exactly?

PC: Well, he didn't have a prayer with me or the rest of the family, I think.

LRH: Good. Now how did you trap him, specifically and exactly?

PC: Well, I don't remember exactly when it was, but I know there was the first time when I kissed him.

LRH: I see.

PC: You know?

LRH: All right. Very, very good. When was that?

PC: Uh ...

LRH: That's it.

PC: Well, that was, I would should say 1938. But, actually, what I'd - happened is I stumbled onto this earlier incident of violence.

LRH: Of what?

PC: Of violence with him ...

LRH: Yeah?

PC: which was not an answer to our question. (laughs)

LRH: I didn't get what this earlier incident was of ...

PC: Well, I've got an incident when I was sixteen when I stopped him from beating Mother.

LRH: Oh, I see.

PC: And it got into a violent - violent incident rather than ...

LRH: I see.

PC: an incident of affection.

LRH: Oh, all right. That's perfectly all right.

PC: Mm.

LRH: Nobody is worrying about this.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: Now, you trapped him with a kiss. Is that right?

PC: Mm-hm.

LRH: All right.

PC: That's - was affection there that actually trapped him.

LRH: An affection. Did you feel the affection?

PC: Yeah.

LRH: All right. Very good. Now, something wrong with affection here, honey.

PC: Well ...

LRH: What is this all about?

PC: Well, you don't demonstrate affection to a German father!

LRH: I know, but what about affection in general?

PC: Well, youuuuuuu - well, actually, it's a trap.

LRH: Uh-huh.

PC: It's - that traps men.

LRH: Affection is a trap.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: Is that - that's the way it equates.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: That's the way it equates.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: All right. Very good.

All right, (PC chuckles) who doesn't know about this?

PC: Charlie doesn't know this.

LRH: Alright How about Jimmy?

PC: Well, yeah, Jimmy doesn't know about this. Actually, this is what goes on with me with the students here, too.

LRH: All right

PC: I want to get close to them, but I already know it's a trap ...

LRH: Yeah, go on. Go on.

PC: to be affectionate. Go on what? Who else doesn't know?

LRH: Tell me. Go on. Who doesn't know about this?

PC: Oh!

LRH: Just get the roster out here.

PC: Well, my dad didn't know it.

LRH: All right.

PC: My brothers.

LRH: That-a-girl.

PC: My ...

LRH: That-a-girl.

PC: (pause) Any - I - I've got it just it's in a trap - it's a trap if you - if you have affection for a man.

LRH: I see.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: I see. All right. And who doesn't find out about this?

PC: (sighs) Well, none of the - none of the men I've ever known.

LRH: Just the lot.

PC: Yeah!

LRH: All right. Very good. Very good. That's all I was trying to check into.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: How about the little kids that you were around?

PC: Well, it's all right to feel affection for kids.

LRH: Well, come on. How early did this start?

PC: Well, it started early - real early with - me with my father. But like it was all right for me to feel ...

LRH: There we are. There we are. The tick tick. Started very early with you or your father.

PC: With my father.

LRH: Did you - how old were you? Four, two, three, what? Four? Two? One? One?

PC: Probably.

LRH: But did you know at that time that it was a ...

PC: No.

LRH: ... action?

Well, when did you overtly use this to betray him?

PC: Well that time when I was eight - eighteen.

LRH: All right. And what happened there exactly? Now, we got onto that a moment ago and got off of it.

PC: Well, just I intended to get him off of this other one he had on. You know, where he's totally individuated. So I demonstrated the affection for him ...

LRH: Hm-hm.

PC: and then ... hmm ... like he was trapped and I was trapped, both, on this one.

LRH: Hm-hm. Is that so?

PC: Yeah.

LRH: All right. What didn't appear there?

PC: Hmm. (long pause) This one flipped ... I - I have trouble with it because I don't ever know whether it's what's supposed to. You know, like a thing that didn't appear there was just actually a warning or a - of things to come.

LRH: All right. All right. Very good. What things to come?

PC: Well, like he was vulnerable then. Mother used this one on him particularly.

LRH: Hm-hm.

PC: She would withdraw affection from him.

LRH: All right. Very good. And who didn't find out about it?

PC: Well, actually I didn't find out about it at that point. I didn't realize that's what I was doing.

LRH: All right. When did you decide this was what you were doing?

PC: Well just - I didn't really connect it up until now.

LRH: Oh, all right. Very good. Very good.

PC: That - that this is part of the thing that goes on with me.

LRH: All right.

PC: That used to bug me.

LRH: All right. This seems real to you.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: I haven't forced any cognition's on you, have I?

PC: No no. of course not. See, this - I have got a late incident. It happened here on course - is the lost incident.

LRH: Yeah? Yeah. Well, there's a whole series of these incidents.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: And they consist of "trapped with affection."

PC: Mmm.

LRH: Trapped with affection.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: All right. All right. Very good. Okay.

Now, how far back does this go?

PC: Well, it doesn't go - just to trap with affection doesn't go. I just wouldn't do it. I never would do that, I don't think. (long pause) I don't remember any earlier incidents. I mean, I would try not to.

LRH: Try not to trap with affection.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: And what does that do? What's the result of that?

PC: You're lonely.

LRH: Oh, I see. So if you use affection, you trap?

PC: Yeah.

LRH: And if you don't use affection, you don't trap?

PC: Mmm.

LRH: I see. All right, honey. All right. And that's very interesting. When is the first time you really trapped a man that way? Or a boy?

PC: Oh, wait a minute. I do have some incidents on this. Actually, I've got an incident with a priest.

LRH: Hm?

PC: (laughs) With a priest ...

LRH: Oh, yeah.

PC: this life. Yeah. Father O'Sullivan. That's what happened there; it just ...

LRH: All right. What life was that?

PC: This life.

LRH: This life?

PC: Yeah. Huh.

LRH: You were a ...

PC: ...was a Catholic this life you see.

LRH: Oh, yeah; All right.

PC: And I was uh - oh, fifteen, sixteen, when Father O'Sullivan was our parish priest.

LRH: All right. Good. And what happened?

PC: Well, it was just I got - just got real - close to him.

LRH: Good.

PC: Got to liking him.

LRH: Good.

PC: And he - it was a real close, affectionate situation. Nothing sexual.

LRH: I know, but uh ...

PC: It was affec - there was a lot of affection ...

LRH: All right.

PC: ... there for - for one - me for him and him for me.

LRH: Okay. Now, exactly what occurred. Something must have occurred.

PC: Well, yeah. l was actually ... This is - this is interesting in view of the fact I said I'm stupid. I was the outstanding student in the catechism class.

LRH: Ah! Very good.

PC: And got just well, just uh, by being outstanding and smart in catechism, I attracted his attention.

LRH: All right. Good.

PC: And just ... I've got a real pull for the affection for him.

LRH: Hm-hm. Go on.

PC: Well, this one was pretty disastrous, because you don't really get that close to a priest.

LRH: Yeah, all right.

PC: It violates the ...

LRH: All right.

PC: (laughs) ... all that's holy in the "Catholic church," you see?

LRH: Right.

PC: But that's all that happened. There wasn't any ...

LRH: Well now, what was disastrous about it? (brief pause) That's it.

PC: Well, for one thing, l don't think he's any longer a priest.

LRH: Oh, really?

PC: Don't think so.

LRH: What did you do?

PC: Well, I don't think I did ... I think I just contributed to this one.

LRH: Yeah, but what happened? There's a ...

PC: Just - just that I - I got closer to a priest than a girl ...

LRH: All right.

PC: ... is supposed to get to a priest.

LRH: And then what happened?

PC: Then he left town.

LRH: Why did he leave town?

PC: I don't know but I do know that he was moved to an Indian mission, which is a reduction in status for a priest.

LRH: All right. Well, what occurred? What happened there? You got a - you're leaving me with blank.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: All right. You're very bright in class, and you get next to this priest, and then he leaves town.

PC: Well, there - actually, there wasn't anything else did happen.

LRH: Well, what did you do that was an overt?

PC: Just got that close to him.

LRH: And that what?

PC: Just to form that much of a personal relationship with him.

LRH: Yeah.

PC: To be on that uh ... just on the same basis with him rather than as a priest - girl in the parish.

LRH: Good. Bing-bing. Now what ... There's something there, see?

PC: Yeah.

LRH: There's something there. There's something more there than just that.

PC: There is?

LRH: What is it?

PC: Well, there's - there was an incident there when uh ...

LRH: Yeah, that's what we want. What is it?

PC: I went into a game with him that you don't - you shouldn't play with a priest. Like I... got mad at him and told him I was never going to speak to him again. And then he got me to speak to him again. I was walking down the street one day and I saw him, and I just had my head ... I wasn't going to speak to him.

LRH: Hm-hm.

PC: And as he passed me, he put his face into my face and said, "Hello."

LRH: Hm-hm.

PC: And we got back into communication again.

LRH: Hm-hm.

PC: But there really... That's about all ...

LRH: Nothing else happened?

PC: No.

LRH: Was there anything happened there? Was there anything happened with that priest?

PC: Mm-mm. That's an - that's enough.

LRH: Was this kind of charged?

PC: Well, that's enough!

LRH: What's enough?

PC: Well, to get that close to a priest! You're not supposed to get close to a priest. Now - uh?

LRH: What did you do to the man?

PC: I don't know.

LRH: Would this ruin him in some way? What's the overt here? Showing affection?

PC: Well, it's - it's knocking him off his priest - priestliness. I mean, he was a man instead of a priest.

LRH: All right. All right. But what happened here, exactly? Did you set out to plan to do this?

PC: No.

LRH: Did you know this was bad?

PC: Yeah.

LRH: You did know this was bad?

PC: Mm-hm.

LRH: Well, you went ahead and did it, though.

PC: Mm.

LRH: Oh, you knew it was bad ...

PC: Mm.

LRH: ... and you went head and did it.

PC: Well sure.

LRH: All right. Who didn't find out about it?

PC: Oh, well, hell, my mother didn't find out about that, or any of the church people.

LRH: All right. Very good.

PC: Besides that, if they'd have found out about it, they'd have said I was uh ... trying to sleep with him, which I wasn't, I don't think.

LRH: Hm-hm. All right. All right. Okay. And what appeared there then?

PC: Well, a man instead of a priest!

LRH: Oh, all right. All right. And who didn't find out about that?

PC: Well, he didn't.

LRH: All right. Very good. Now, when was this exactly?

PC: In '36. I was sixteen, I think.

LRH: Over what period of time was it? How many weeks? months? days?

PC: Uh ... was that - that summer when I was being prepared for confirmation.

LRH: Go on.

PC: Uh ... was in the summertime - was in summer school. I was being prepared for confirmation, to it was over a period of weeks.

LRH: Over a period of weeks.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: Very good. And what didn't appear there?

PC: Hm. I'm hung up on a - occurrence there, too.

LRH: What is the occurrence?

PC: Well, he flipped me one time when he was testing us finally for our uh ... whether we were fit to be confirmed. And he tested all the other students on uh ... the catc - the catechism.

LRH: Mm-hm.

PC: But he asked me questions out of the Bible. That was a betrayal, because I didn't know anything about the Bible.

LRH: Oh, I see. All right. Good enough. And who didn't find out about it?

PC: What...

LRH: Who didn't get any answers? (LRH: and PC laugh)

PC: He didn't. He didn't. I hit a blank.

LRH: All right. You hit a blank.

PC: Ah.

LRH: That's quite interesting. Before that, you were bright. Is that what you are saying?

PC: Yeah.

LRH: And after that you were stupid.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: All right. How do you account for this?

PC: Why, that I was just - I was going to ... cognite (laughs) on this. I was wondering if this had any connection with ...

LRH: Well, is that correct?

PC: Well yeah. It - just after that I had . .

LRH: Am I rushing your cognition?

PC: Yeah. You are. (laughs)

LRH: All right.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: Good enough.

PC: Cause it was - just that feeling there of stupidity.

LRH: You ever spot this before?

PC: No not really.

LRH: All right.

PC: But I - there's something else there.

LRH: Yeah. what is there?

PC: Well, a feel there that I betrayed hm.

LRH: Mm-hm.

PC: And...

LRH: Did you?

PC: Yeah.

LRH: How?

PC: I was supposed to be smart. I was supposed to know about the Bible.

LRH: Oh, I see. You were supposed to know ...

PC: Mmm.

LRH: ... about the Bible.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: All right. And what happened?

PC: I didn't.

LRH: Uh-huh.

PC: I didn't ever...

LRH: And who didn't find out about it?

PC: Well, he did - he didn't find out it soon enough to not ask me the questions.

LRH: I see. Well, when did this examination - this examination take place, in front of witnesses?

PC: Oh, yeah. Up in front of the other students.

LRH: Oh, I see. All right. And that was a source of what to you?

PC: Well, a source of failure on him, like I was supposed to ...

TBD

LRH: What were you trying to cover up in front of these students?

PC: (Pause) Huh?

LRH: That area must be loaded with missed withholds.

PC: Well, I did try to cover up that he - that I was his favorite.

LRH: Yeah. All right. What else didn't they find out there?

PC: (pause) Well, you know, what I have a feel of here is that they failed to find out, was that I didn't consider myself smart because I knew catechism. Catechism is a cinch.

LRH: Mm-hm.

PC: I mean, there's - any knucklehead could learn about catechism.

LRH: All right. And they didn't find out about that?

PC: Mmm.

LRH: All right. Very good. Now, did you to anything to this priest?

PC: Well I sure let him down that day.

LRH: All right. Very good. This made him feel foolish?

PC: Yeah.

LRH: Hm-hm. Did he look confused?

PC: Mm-hm.

LRH: All right. So what did you do there?

PC: Mm. I was noticing something else there, too.

LRH: What?

PC: Well, he expected ... this has happened a lot in my life. He expected me to be smarter than I was. I didn't come through, you know?

LRH: Mm-hm.

PC: I've got an incident like that on you.

LRH: Yeah, yeah. All right.

PC: In '55.

LRH: All right.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: Okay. And your brightness failed to appear, is that right?

PC: Yeah! It sure did, man!

LRH: All right. Very good.

PC: That's - that's right. It ...

LRH: Yeah.

PC: Let me down boy. It didn't appear.

LRH: (chuckles) All right. Very good. And who hasn't found out - who's been in the dark about this?

PC: You.

LRH: All right.

PC: It's failing to appear here, too, you know - (laughs) my brightness. Yeah.

LRH: All right. Okay. All right. Very good. All right, then, what's the missed withhold?

PC: I ain't as bright as people think I am, is actually the missed withhold.

LRH: Hm-hm.

PC: I'm not.

LRH: And well, what is that the thing that everybody misses on you?

PC: Mmm.

LRH: Hm-hm.

PC: Mother and all.

LRH: Everybody misses this.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: One and all.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: All right. Let's go back to this incident in the cornfield.

PC: Okay.

LRH: Is that a piece of it?

PC: Uh.

LRH: Is that part of the same picture?

PC: Yeah.

LRH: Yeah? Well, how is it part of the same picture?

PC: Well, my brightness didn't appear there, because if it had have, I would have known that Mother - this was not one of Mothers acceptability's. She - that she - just, sex was something she just couldn't confront.

LRH: All right.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: All right. Okay. Now, is there any earlier incident when somebody should have known this?

PC: (pause) No. That I - not that I remember.

LRH: All right. I don't get anything clicking on the meter.

PC: Oh, good. (sighs)

LRH: All right. Now, there seems to be, though, a whole chain of incidents here.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: Something on this order.

PC: Yeah. There is.

LRH: Just describe this circumstance to me here. Just what we've been finding out and plumbing into here, and so forth.

PC: Well what I've got straight is that any darn fool can learn anything that they have - you know, that's easy to learn.

LRH: Yeah.

PC: But uh, if it's hard, I'm not bright. I can't learn anything hard.

LRH: All right. Good. Click-click. There it is.

PC: Yeah. Sure, I mean, Scientology auditing is hard.

LRH: All right.

PC: Like, I can sit town and get a preclear to talk to me.

LRH: All right.

PC: But I can't do a heck of a lot with Class III stuff.

LRH: All right.

PC: You know?

LRH: Click-click.

PC: (sniffs) Mmm.

LRH: Hm-hm. Well, how does this all add up?

PC: (sighs; pause) Well, it adds up to "I am not acceptable to people as soon as they find out I'm not bright." That's how it adds up.

LRH: Now, what proved this to you when you were four or six or something like that? What...

PC: Well, because Mother told me I was no - not acceptable to her.

LRH: When did she say this?

PC: When I was four.

LRH: Hm hm. What did you do?

PC: I ...

LRH: What had you done?

PC: You mean because she said that?

LRH: Mmm.

PC: Well, I had communicated to her about an experience that I thought she - you know, that ...[gap in recording]

LRH: Is there another sexual incident when you were - that. Bing, bang. What's that?

PC: Well, did - I've always had a - a horror that one day I was going to get something unoccluded and find that my father had sexually ...

LRH: All right.

PC: But I uh ... I have no recall on this.

LRH: All right. Very good. We got the same tick-tick on your father here a while ago.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: Now, what is this? Did something happen with your father?

PC: Mm.

LRH: Was there some sexual incident with your father?

PC: No, except that he was capable of it.

LRH: Bing. Bang. Is there a sexual incident with your father?

PC: Before? No

LRH: Well, at any time.

PC: No. The only thing that I have on my father is that one time when I was taking a bath I didn't pull the curtains, and he uh ... watched me through the windows when I was naked.

LRH: All right.

PC: That's all he did.

LRH: When was that?

PC: Oh, I was eighteen - nine - seventeen or eighteen then - by then.

LRH: All right. All right. Good.

PC: And then, of course, the other thing I have is I've always been afraid of - my father was going to sexually molest me, ever since I was a child I was afraid ...

LRH: Thought what?

PC: Huh?

LRH: Ever since you were what?

PC: A child.

LRH: Yeah. You always were afraid of that.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: Well, who told you this.

PC: Well, Mother told me.

LRH: What did she tell you?

PC: Well, she told me that he wasn't uh ... safe to be around. Girls weren't safe to be around hm.

LRH: Oh, I see. And who didn't find out about her telling you?

PC: Dad.

LRH: All right. Who else didn't find out about it? Anybody else?

PC: I doubt it. She used to scream this one to the high housetops whenever she was um ...

LRH: And what did she used to scream to the high housetop?

PC: That he was a monster and a beast and all this type of thing. I ...

LRH: Is that so?

PC: Mm.

LRH: All right.

PC: My mother never did uh ... uh ...

LRH: All right. Did anything of this character ever happen?

PC: Did - with Dad, you mean?

LRH: Hm-mm.

PC: Well, not that I know of. I've heard of incidences where he did. My mother...

Actually, I'm sure it was true, but I didn't know about it until later.

LRH: What was true?

PC: Well, that he had molested my uh ... aunt when she was nine.

LRH: All right.

PC: But uh this was way before my time.

LRH: Mmm.

PC: And I didn't find out about that till I was sixteen.

LRH: All right. Is any of this an overt against your father?

PC: (sighs) Well, now it is because I have a better understanding what was going on with him. Now, let's see, was it at the time? It seems like it was, some feel there but not any...

LRH: Mm, all right. Well, what's this four year old incident we're looking for?

PC: Umm.

LRH: Tick-tick. What is it? Tick-tick what is it? Come on. There it is.

PC: Yeah. Well, this one's been plaguing me ever since '50, and I don't know what it is.

LRH: Oh, you've had something plaguing you since '50.

PC: Yeah. This turns up quite often.

LRH: What?

PC: Just that there - I get four and six messed up.

LRH: Is that the only thing about it that plagues you?

PC: No it just uh ... I feel like something did happen, but I don't know what it is.

LRH: All right. All right. Very good. All right. Now, just think about this for a moment.

What happened to you when you were four? That's it.

PC: Well, what I thought of is I moved from North Dakota to Park City, but that - that happened to me, but ...

LRH: Mm-mm.

PC: ... that doesn't seem very significant.

LRH: All right. What did you do? What did you do when you were four? That's it Tickety-tick.

PC: Now I have a stuck picture of the granary - when I was sitting in the granary.

LRH: Granary.

PC: Mm. But I don't know what I did.

LRH: What granary?

PC: Uh - this I think, is in Park City. I think

LRH: All right. Well, who hasn't found out about it?

PC: Most auditors

LRH: All right. Who else hasn't found out about it? -

PC: Well, Mother did ... I don't think Mother found out about it.

LRH: All right. Who else hasn't fount out about this four-year-old incident?

PC: (sighs) Well, I haven't found out about it.

LRH: All right. Very good. How long haven't you found out about it?

PC: Sheesh, ever since 1950, when it got dredged up somehow in engram running.

LRH: 1950.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: Very good. Now, who missed that - withhold in 1950?

PC: Mildred.

LRH: Hm?

PC: Mildred. My first - one of my first auditors.

LRH: All right. And what did she miss? Tick-tick.

PC: Hm. Just missed that I feel there is something there and I don't know what it is.

LRH: All right. Did you tell her there was something there?

PC: Well, it was more like she was making - you know, having me go earlier and earlier, and I would - I bumped into it.

LRH: And what did you bump into?

PC: Just uh ... uh ... more of a - an impression that something happened.

LRH: What's the impression? What do you mean, impression?

PC: Four. All I get is - just a picture flashes that I'm on this granary - I was sitting in the grainary and I'm sure I had something that I had stolen, but I don't know what it is.

And I'm sure it was something that belonged to the neighbor gal, and I don't - I - I'm sure I was hiding.

LRH: Mm-hm.

PC: But that's all I can get on it.

LRH: All right. Is that what you bumped into when you were in 1950?

PC: Uh . . the impression - it didn't really ...

LRH: Oh, you know more about it now than ...

PC: Yeah

LRH: ... you did in '50.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: All right. Has this sort of haunted you, this little four-year-old period here?

PC: Yeah.

LRH: All right. Well, who's missed it as a withhold?

PC: Well Mildred missed it.

LRH: Who else?

PC: Paul.

LRH: Good. Who else?

PC: Actually, Donna is the one that uh ... dredged it up. I got more on it with her than any other auditor.

LRH: Oh, people have been looking for this?

PC: Yeah.

LRH: I see. Good. And who's missed it?

PC: Um ... Juanita.

LRH: Good. Who else has missed it?

PC: (sighs; pause) Hm. Uh, I was looking at the '55 auditors. Hazel Hart.

LRH: All right. Good. Who else has missed it?

PC: Actually, Dick missed it here on uh... course.

LRH: All right.

PC: Yeah. He was ...

LRH: Good. Good.

PC: ... poking around in that area.

LRH: All right. Who else has missed it.

PC: That's about all. The one I'm looking at here is just a long - the - all these auditors poking around trying to uncover this one and never being able to ...

LRH: Hm-hm.

PC: ... get it.

LRH: Did you think there was anything there originally?

PC: Uh . . not uh ... No, not really.

LRH: You didn't think there was anything ...

PC: No

LRH: ... there originally.

PC: Yeah. It's just that uh ...

LRH: Just a ...

PC: ... there should be something when I - that I should have a time track when I'm four years old, shouldn't I? (laughs)

LRH: I see. All right. All right. Is it because the time track is missing there?

PC: That's partially it. The other one is that I have got the confusion there. I've always had the six-year-old picture ...

LRH: Mmm.

PC: ... and I always got it confused: it's now, it's six; it's four, it's six ...

LRH: Mm-hm. And u this what they usually take off on?

PC: Mmm.

LRH: And so forth. And you usually bring this up.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: Is that right?

PC: Mmm.

LRH: Now, how do you always bring this up?

PC: (sighs) Because they ask me questions on it, and I never know what to do with it. I mean you - how am I supposed to answer up to something I don't remember?

LRH: All right. But how come this turns up in the first place?

PC: Because my attention just goes that way. I go bloomp on this picture, and then I go four, six. There must some - been something happened at four.

LRH: Mm-hm.

PC: I go figuring on it.

LRH: Hm-mm. Well, who basically is missing this withhold?

PC: (sighs) Well, I am, basically.

LRH: All right.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: All right. Fine. Is there anything there that's withheld?

PC: Just ...

LRH: Is there anything happened when you were four?

PC: I don't know. You see, th-there must - have been something happened, but I don't know.

LRH: Well, good. Well, why do you want auditors to look there?

PC: I don't, particularly.

LRH: Look. Look-a-here. We're going over this ground.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: How come we're sitting there?

PC: Yeah.

LRH: That's fascinating ...

PC: Yeah!

LRH: ... isn't it? (pause) now, is there something on either side of this that you want an auditor to avoid? I'm not asking you a dirty question.

PC: Mm, I don 't mind you asking.

LRH: But is there something there you'd like to be - something there that you want an avoidance on? There something there you're trying to avoid? Is there something there you're trying to get auditors to avoid?

PC: No.

LRH: Nope. That's right. This is clean.

PC: Hm-mm.

LRH: See, I've got to ask these questions to straighten it out.

PC: Hm-mm.

LRH: All right. Did anything happen when you were four? I don't find anything on - the meter.

PC: (exhales) Well, that's fine with me.

LRH: Well, who insisted there was something at four? I just asked you if there was something at four. I haven't insisted there's anything there. But who, amongst your auditors, insisted there was something there?

PC: (sighs; pause) Well... (pause) Uh ... I don 't know what they ...

LRH: There is something right there.

PC: Yeah, well, I'm not sure that they insisted; just like it come up and they would poke.

LRH: They'd what?

PC: They'd poke on - in that area to see if we could open up the track.

LRH: Yeah.

PC: You know? Uh I don't think they insisted on it, however: Like I would do the same thing I did tonight: it's six, it's four, it's six, it's four.

LRH: Well what do you do? Cut your throat on the subject of sex when you were about four - six by telling on your brother? Is there some regret involved in this?

PC: Well, sure.

LRH: Yeah, what's the regret?

PC: (pause) Well ... (long pause; sighs) Actually: the most regret I have on this is Mother.

Because, I mean, l didn't uh... cut my brothers throat on this one. I mean, Mother beat him up, but then that isn't particularly disastrous. You know?

LRH: Well, what's disastrous there?

PC: That my mother had uh well, had her ideas of a how a little girl should behave, shook.

LRH: Mmm.

PC: I hadn't intended that.

LRH: Mmm. Do something to your mother?

PC: Well sure I just I did - I indulged in sex play that was totally something she didn't want me to do Yeah, she's got something like "you're ruined if you do." You know?

LRH: Mm-mm.

PC: 'Course, I have too.

LRH: Mm-mm.

PC: Yeah. And like I-I didn't ever intend for her to get this one shook up.

LRH: Get what?

PC: Get this idea of hers shook up

LRH: Mm-mm. Well did she talk to you about the commercial value of all this?

PC: That was later.

LRH: Oh, yeah. But at that time there was something about this.

PC: Yeah I didn't actually know she was - was sitting that strongly on... on it.

LRH: I see. All right. Now, let's skip what you don't know. Let's take a look at what you know in that period. (PC sighs) Now, that do you know in that period?

PC: What period?

LRH: Anytime. Four, six, somewhere around in that lifetime area, in that life area.

PC: Well, I know that incident.

LRH: All right.

PC: l know the incident when I was four when I hit my - that little girl. I was four then.

LRH: When you were four ...

PC: Hm.

LRH: ... you were what?

PC: I hit that little girl. I know about that.

LRH: You know about that.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: All right. Is that an overt?

PC: Well, sure.

LRH: All right. How long have you known about that?

PC: Well I've always known that one.

LRH: All right. Good And what other incident do you know in four-six period?

PC: (pause) Oh, wait a minute. I-I-I know why auditors would go off on this one, is because I still have that uh ... one there that is the uh-... divided thing where I was sitting in the hall. I don't - I can't account for that.

LRH: What hall?

PC: Yeah, it's a side porch.

LRH: Yeah, what about the side porch? You mean you got - had a - what about this picture? You mean you've got a picture there ...

PC: Mm.

LRH: ... and auditors keep hitting it?

PC: Yeah. It turns - it uh, it just automatically comes up when I think about that uh ...

LRH: I see. At four you get a picture of the side porch.

PC: Yeah. And so on ...

LRH: Six and four.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: Ohhh. Is it...

PC: Like...

LRH: ... is it this lifetime?

PC: Hm ?

LRH: Is the picture anything to do with this lifetime?

PC: I can't be sure about that.

LRH: Mm-mm. So you got a picture.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: Interesting. How many other pictures you got? (pause) Bang! What's that?

PC: Well, I bumped into that one where I saw that man sitting on the - in the rocking chair He was a monster.

LRH: Hm?

PC: (laughs) Oh, I saw this monster sitting in the rocking chair, and ... But this actually is an actual ... I don't know whether I slapped a picture over it or there was actually a man - man sitting there. But he was there and I called my sister and she came out, and he wasn't. He'd disappeared out of the chair.

LRH: Yeah...

PC: I got that picture.

LRH: All right. All right. Okay. All right. Now, what don't we know about this period?

PC: (sighs) Mmmmmmmm.

LRH: What is unknown about this period?

PC: Well, everything - my whole chronological events of my life in that period is unknown to me.

LRH: All right. Very good. And who been missing all these?

PC: Oh, well, all the auditors missed that.

LRH: Well, good. What's the withholds in this area? What are the real withholds in this area?

PC: (Pause) Well, my whole ... my life is a withhold there. What did I do? What was I like? You know?

LRH: Hmm. All right. And who's been missing it?

PC: Mostly me.

LRH: All right.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: Very good. Very good. And any other data you'd like to tell me about concerning that right now? All right. We got a little halt - little click, little click. What's that? What are you going over? Bing. Bing. What are you going over there?

PC: Well mostly, I've - I'm ... come into present time and noticing it was getting late is all.

LRH: All right. Good. Is that what you're noticing?

PC: Hmm..

LRH: All right. Very good. Now, what about sleeping with a man to trap him?

PC: Jimmy is the only one I'd - or it would have been Charlie.

LRH: Hm?

PC: Yeah, Jimmy and Charlie. No, this isn't true. I had some promiscuity ...

LRH: Hm?

PC: I had some promiscuity occurred in between Jimmy and Charlie. But I wasn't intending to entrap.

LRH: All right. Very good. All right. Just let me ask you that question now.

PC: Okay.

LRH: All right. Let's find out what this is - what the reaction we get on this.

PC: Hmm.

LRH: All right. What about sleeping with a man to trap him? Just seems peculiarly uncharged now.

PC: Mmm. This feels uncharged.

LRH: Well, do you suddenly feel better about it?

PC: Yeah.

LRH: Did you feel worse about it than you do feel?

PC: Well, I did during the break - felt worse - worse ...

LRH: Mm-hm.

PC: than I did. Uh ... I feel all right about it now.

LRH: Mm-mm. Do you think anything has occurred here, then?

PC: Yeah.

LRH: What?

PC: Well I feel more uh-uh ... well, actually, less frantic about uh ... the whole thing, and notice a lot of connections between my present behavior and uh ... past stuff.

LRH: Hm, hm.

PC: You know?

LRH: Hmm.

PC: Like it's what's going on with me with this chronic PTP is just the story of my life.

LRH: All right, honey.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: All right. Nothing too new in this then.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: All right, honey. Now, we got a null on this "What" question.

PC: Oh. Good-o.

LRH: And so if it's all right with you, why, I'd like to end that Prepcheckng and bring us down the line.

PC: Mm.

LRH: Okay?

PC: That's fine. Fine.

LRH: All right? All right? Okay. Anything you care to say or ask before I end that Prepchecking?

PC: No just ...

LRH: All right.

PC: ... thank you.

LRH: All right. All right. Here we go. Okay. Let's walk into these end rudiments, huh?

PC: Okay.

LRH: All right. Have you told me any half-truth? Have you told me any half-truth? Untruth? - All right. Come up to present time.

PC: Mm. Okay.

LRH: All right. (PC sighs) See if we get this thing a little bit better here.

PC: Mm.

LRH: Have you told me any half-truth? Thank you. Untruth?

PC: Mm.

LRH: All right. Said something only to impress me? Oh, what have you said only to impress me?

PC: Well, I always get the impression when I'm sitting here talking that I am impressing.

LRH: All right.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: All right. You doing it on purpose?

PC: No.

LRH: All right. Have you done it on purpose just for me?

PC: No.

LRH: All right. All right. have you said something only to impress me?

PC: No.

LRH: All right. Not anything particularly?

PC: Mm-mm.

LRH: All right. Let me clear that again.

PC: Mm.

LRH: Have you said something only to impress me? That's all right. Have you tried to damage anyone in this session? (short pause) Tried to damage anyone in this ... Boy, you sure stop on damage, don't you?

PC: Yeah.

LRH: The damage kid, huh?

PC: Yeah. (LRH: and PC chuckle)

LRH: All right. Okay. Now listen to me: Have you tried to damage anyone in this session?

PC: No.

LRH: That's so right. All right. Have you deliberately tried to influence the E-Meter?

PC: No.

LRH: All right. That's in this session?

PC: Mmm.

LRH: All right. In this session have you deliberately tried to influence the E-Meter?

PC: No.

LRH: All right. The subject of E-Meter seems a little rough with you here.

PC: Yeah, I got a lot of uh ...

LRH: What's the matter?

PC: ... you, never can tell what the meter is reading on. You know?

LRH: Don't auditors tell you?

PC: Oh Well, yeah, they tell me, but they say "Well, I - have I missed a withhold and - and they say - I say, they say "Well, it's clicking" and then I-it's unreal to me that uh ... I... I... because I don't feel like I've failed to tell an auditor something. Then I dig, and it does clean up.

LRH: Mmm. Mmm. What do you answer them for?

PC: What do you mean?

LRH: Just what do you answer them for?

PC: Well, they say "Have I missed a withhold on you?" and I say no.

LRH: They actually missed at talking to the meter.

PC: Is that what goes on?

LRH: Well, sure. And you say - they say "Have I missed a withhold on you?" you see, and you say no. And they say "Oh, yes, you have" and so forth. - What are you talking for?

PC: Ha!

LRH: They're just rudiments.

PC: Oh!

LRH: You don't have to say anything.

PC: Well then I feel like if I don't do that, then I end up with "Have you ..." It will read when it says "Have you failed to answer a question or a command?" (laughing)

LRH: All right. That's going to be and be caught three ways from the middle.

PC: Yeah. (LRH: and PC laugh) You're trapped any way you do it.

LRH: All right, honey. Well, you go ahead and answer it or not, as you please. (laughs)

PC: Okay.

LRH: Okay. All right. Have you failed to answer any question or command I've given you in this session? That's clean. Thank you. You see, you didn't get a chance to answer me, did you?

PC: Mmm. .

LRH: All right. In this session, have I missed a withhold on you? There's a tiny, latent slowdown. Is there a little bit of something that ...

PC: Just uh ...

LRH: That's it.

PC: I'm sure if I dredged, I probably could find a lot of things, but like I - you haven't missed anything.

LRH: All right. But in this session ...

PC: Yeah.

LRH: ... in this session ...

PC: Yeah.

LRH: ... what we have done ...

PC: Yeah.

LRH: ... have I missed a withhold on you?

PC: No.

LRH: All right. I got a tick. I got a little latent tick here.

PC: Yeah. Well, I'm afraid if I take a look that I'm going to find something. Then it's going to be missed.

LRH: Go ahead and take a look.

PC: Okay.

LRH: I'm running this session. You relax!

PC: (laughs) Yeah. Okay.

LRH: (chuckles) All right.

PC: Let's see. (pause) No. Nothing.

LRH: All right. All right, let me check that again. In this session, have I missed a withhold on you? I got a click.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: That's it. That's it. That's it. Right there.

PC: Well just uh ... see, this didn't turn up in this session.

LRH: Hm?

PC: It didn't turn up in this session, but it's - it's here now.

LRH: What is it?

PC: That's what I don't understand.

LRH: All right. Well, all right.

PC: Uh well, like I've got some discreditable habits that I don't particularly like uh ... to talk about.

LRH: All right. All right.

PC: You know?

LRH: All right. Have I failed to find out about those?

PC: Yeah.

LRH: All right. Good. Good. All right. In this session have I missed a withhold on you? Well, it's just a latent tick now. - Now, what did you think of on that latent tick?

PC: Just wondering, well, are you going to - if it's going to click again.

LRH: Click click, click; There it is.

PC: Yeah. Just - just wondering, is it going to click again?

LRH: Well, no, it's latent.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: It's latent. I'm just being mean. I'm just cleaning it up hard ...

PC: Yeah.

LRH: ... see? All right. In this session, have I missed a withhold on you? Yeah. Tick.

PC: Hmm.

LRH: Tick.

PC: Well, what you're you've missed is I get uh ... just my ... my mmm ... I'm thinking thoughts, and now it's a missed withhold, and damn it. You know?

LRH: What is it?

PC: Just, well.

LRH: Are you sitting there trying to run the session?

PC: Uh ...

LRH: Trying to keep yourself from thinking things and thinking things and ...

PC: Uh ... yeah. Actually, I'm trying not to dump all my case in your lap.

LRH: Well, thank you. Are you trying to keep me from missing a withhold? (chuckles)

PC: Yeah.

LRH: Yeah. All right. (chuckles)

PC: Yeah.

LRH: You're working much too hard, you know?

PC: Yeah. I am.

LRH: You know? That's my job just now. (laughs)

PC: Yeah. (chuckles) Okay.

LRH: All right. Now, what I've asked for and what I've looked into, you've told me, haven't you?

PC: Mm-hm.

LRH: Right. All right. Now, let me ask this question again. In this session, have I missed a withhold on you? There, that's very latent, and we're just going to leave it that way.

PC: Good.

LRH: All right. Because I think that one came up from anxiety of "is it going to be clean?"

PC: Yeah. It did.

LRH: You sure have a hell of a time with the meter.

PC: Yeah, I do.

LRH: Yeah. You're not used to an auditor like me. I just maul you around and say (chuckles) you're supposed to do this and that.

PC: Haaa. (sighs)

LRH: All right. Look around here and tell me if you can have anything. Click!

PC: I can really here that picture. It reminds me of the outrigger picture, the one that's in The Outrigger in Seattle.

LRH: All right. Good enough. Let me check this again.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: Look around here and tell me if you can have anything. Tiny slowdown. What else did you run into?

PC: I was staring right into the face of the camera.

LRH: Oh, all right. It isn't on, that one.

PC: Ah, good-o.

LRH: All right. Let me check it again.

PC: Okay

LRH: All right. Look around here and tell me if you can have anything.

PC: That telephone.

LRH: That's my girl.

PC: Mm.

LRH: That was quite late.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: So we're just going to leave that one right there.

PC: Good.

LRH: You might give me a can - wait just a minute now. This ...

PC: I've got them clutched awfully hard.

LRH: That's all right. I just - well, let me make sure that you've got some havingness here.

Squeeze them. Man! Man, who runs you with havingness that far down? What's your ordinary havingness run?

PC: Point out something.

LRH: Hm?

PC: You mean the process?

LRH: Yeah.

PC: Point out something.

LRH: Yeah? Well, here we go. We're going to run a few commands of that. All right?

PC: Would it be if - okay if I just do it like ...

LRH: That? Just do it right like that.

PC: Okay.

LRH: All right. Point out something.

PC: You.

LRH: Thank you. Point out something.

PC: That lamp.

LRH: Thank you. Point out something.

PC: That picture.

LRH: Thank you. Point out something.

PC: That - that thing on the mantel.

LRH: Good. Point out something.

PC: The camera.

LRH: Thank you. All right. Squeeze the cans, just like you did before.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: Boy, that's certainly not much can squeeze. How are you holding those cans?

PC: I'm clutching them.

LRH: All right. Give them a squeeze. All right. Point out something.

PC: The telephone.

LRH: Good. Point out something.

PC: Those uh ... curtains.

LRH: Good. Point out something.

PC: The radiator.

LRH: Good. Point out something.

PC: The ... the television.

LRH: Good. Point out something.

PC: That chair.

LRH: Good. Point out something.

PC: That camera.

LRH: Good. Point out something.

PC: Uh ... that cabinet.

LRH: Good. All right. Squeeze the cans.

All right. Point out something.

PC: The couch.

LRH: Good. Point out something.

PC: That fireplace.

LRH: Good. Point out something.

PC: The fire.

LRH: Good Point out something.

PC: Uh, the model under - on the floor:

LRH: Good. Point out something.

PC: Uh ... that glass.

LRH: Good. Point out something.

PC: The lights.

LRH: All right. Put your cans in your lap now. All right. Squeeze the cans. That's better.

PC: Mmm.

LRH: All right. Point out something.

PC: That case.

LRH: Good. Point out something.

PC: That chest.

LRH: Good. Point out something.

PC: Uh ... those wires.

LRH: Good. Point out something.

PC: The curtains.

LRH: All right. If it's all right with you, I'll give you two more commands and end this process.

PC: Fine.

LRH: Very good. Point out something.

PC: Uh ... you. (chuckles)

LRH: Good. Point out something.

PC: The sign.

LRH: Good. All right. Is there anything you care to say before I end that process?

PC: Just I feel more here.

LRH: All right. Excellent. End of process.

PC: Okay.

LRH: Okay. Now, have you made any part of your gains this session - any part of your goals for this session, which was to find the missed withhold?"

PC: Yeah. That one doesn't seem very real to me somehow. But uh ...

LRH: That goal? Yeah?

PC: Yeah. It just uh ... what's more real to me is that uh ... the chronic PTP is more handled.

LRH: (chuckles) Oh, all right.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: Well, did we find something about this, and so forth?

PC: Yeah, on that one.

LRH: All right. Then you say "to get this PTP handled." Do you feel better about this PTP?

PC: Yeah I do.

LRH: All right, honey. Very good. All right. Is there any gains you'd care to mention?

PC: Well I just feel uh ... much more comfortable about you. That's a big gain.

LRH: (chuckles) All right.

PC: Yeah.

LRH: Okay.

PC: Yes.

LRH: All right. Anything else?

PC: Uh ... (pause) There's another gain here, but I don't know how to put it. Um ...

Yes, I do too know what it is. Uh ... um ... more willingness to communicate freely in front of a-a-a group. I didn't realize I'd be this comfortable about that.

LRH: (chuckles) Oh, all right. Very good.

PC: I didn't have to not-is them either. I was sort of on the edge of awareness that they were there.

LRH: (chuckles) Well, I must say you came through excellently well with that little warning. That ...

PC: Yeah.

LRH: That was a surprise.

PC: I was totally in awe when I came up.

LRH: All right. And then, is there anything that you would care to say or ask before I end this session?

PC: No. That's all.

LRH: All right. Is it all right with you if I end this session now?

PC: Mmm.

LRH: All right. Here it is. End of session.

Okay. Has the session ended for you?

PC: Yes.

LRH: Very good. Tell me I'm no longer auditing you.

PC: You're no longer auditing me.

LRH: All right. Very good.

PC: And thanks again.

LRH: You're certainly welcome.

[End of lecture]